I'm only doing this because Faith and Allie are making me, and I don't want to be a disappointment.
Things I'm Really Really Good At
-Taking really short showers. Like, I love being clean, but I hate the whole process of showering. I don't get how you people can shower for 30 minutes. And DON'T tell me you use that time to "think." The only thinking I can do in the shower is "did I already shampoo my scalp?" and "Do I really need to shave today?" (The answer is always no, thank the good Lord for maxi dresses.) I don't have time for any other thoughts during my 7 minute power showers. I'll do my serious thinking after a glass of alcohol thanks very much.
(Basically my emotions about showering)
Name that show.
-Sleeping. I have zero problems sleeping in. I would sleep until noon if I could (and maybe I do on the weekends). It's not being lazy, it's a legitimate talent. My old roommate Lisa used to get frustrated with me because in the summer I would sleep through all the prime sun time. SORRY my bad. Also, in college one of my friends made a Facebook photo album of all the times any of us fell asleep at random times. I was the star of that album.
-Eating popsicles. One time at a bachelorette party there was a contest to see who could eat a Big Stick Popsicle the fastest without using their teeth. I'll spare you the deets, but I won. No one else was even close.
It's not a popsicle but you get the idea.
Yeah, that's pretty accurate.
-Chugging. Have you ever had an AMF? I'll wait while you Urban Dictionary that. One night I chugged 3 of them and then tried to do the ancient Japanese art of karaoKAY (name that movie) and sing "Like a Virgin," which I didn't know. The bouncer asked me to leave when I fell off the stage. Then I puked on a tree. Oh and did I mention this was on a Monday? BUT I WON THE CHUGGING CONTEST.